So here we go our separate ways. There is no point hoping to revert this anymore. I came to terms with the fact that it is what it is, and it is not going to change. It is hard to imagine my life without you, it is hard to start a draft of a different future. I wish I did not have to start over, I wish I did not have to get to know anyone else. It is you that I want for my life, it is you I envision in my future and I just can’t remove that future from my head. No matter how hard reality is hitting me you are still embedded in my story. I feel that something died inside of me the day you told me you did not love me. I kept on insisting but I understand there is so much I can do to win you back. As you said, this is what I want but not what you want so it is time for me to stop. I broke you and I broke myself. I never thought love could hurt this much. I just want to thank you for loving me so much, so openly, so honestly. I am sorry i could not understand your way of communicating your love, for not realizing how deep it was, for breaking up with you to elicit a strong reaction so I would actually hear you say so. I deeply, deeply regret having betrayed your devotion. Thank you for being my support in stressful times. Thank you for believing in me when even I doubted myself. You made me smarter, you made me stronger and even though this is done, you even left me with many relationship lessons that i had to learn the hard way. I’m sad. This week has been really hard but it is like going to the gym. It will get better and eventually it’ll stop hurting and will start shaping into a better outcome. I just wish I did not have to make an effort to forget you. I wish I could go back to taking care of you. I miss everything about you. Watching you work on the computer, which by the way is what i secretly used to do in riverside; feeling your touch at night, especially these cold night which are great to just cuddle; but most of all i just miss talking to you. I miss our conversations, our disagreements, our arguments. I feel very lonely. You were my best friend, you were my family in a place where it is so hard to find someone to relate to. I moved here because i could not stand the idea of being away from you. I have no idea how I will do it without you in my life. I feel lost, vulnerable, scared. and terribly terribly lonely. I feel dead. I know I will get over this, it will take me a while but I will get better and you will be part of a "sometimes great, sometimes terrible, but mostly wonderful" time. I just wish I did not have to do so. Wherever you are when you read this, if you ever do, I hope you are happy, I hope you don’t give up on love and I hope you get to smile often. I really wish you all the best in life because there is nothing better than to see you happy.

Lots of love,

Loly

It took longer than a decade for scientist to decipher the physics behind "the coffee ring efect", or why does the coffee leave a stain that is clear in the middle but dark around the edges. Here is a cool video of their findings:

After a wonderful but exhausting weekend with my very best friend and her three energetic kids, I came back home to find a huge steak accompanied by asparagus risotto awaiting for me. I ate 3/4 of the dish in ten minutes, took a shower and PASSED OUT immediately after. So much for the loving girlfriend Erik was expecting. Kids severely wear me out. I am clearly NOT ready for triplets. The sad thing is that the meal was not over. Erik had prepared a surprise desert, based on my latest insane flan cravings.:flan ice cream. He basically took the joy of cooking’s flan recipe and twisted it into an ice cream. The result is the most perfect ice cream I have had so far. Better than ANY other we have made. Here goes the recipe:

combine in a saucepan:

one 14oz can of sweetened condensed milk

1.5 cups milk

pinch of salt

bring to a boil and simmer for 5 min

then temper in:

4 large eggs

3 large egg yolks

half cup sugar

return to heat and bring up to 180 degrees. Chill in an ice bath and cool in fridge for several hours.

For the caramel in a saucepan add:

half cup sugar

teaspoon corn syrup

1/8 cup water

Make caramel out of it and pour on a baking sheet then break it up into 1/4 - 1/2" pieces. Pour custard into ice cream machine. When the ice cream is almost done add the caramel pieces.

Today is my baby’s (a.k.a nephew) birthday. He is4 years old. He is as adorable as they come but most importantly he has a good heart. He is always asking if he can help and boy does he break my heart every time he asks if he can come visit me. After a bad start of this week with a lot of sobbing and a major breakdown (and it is only Wednesday. Don’t you envy Erik?) I reluctantly logged in to skype to send him a video-kiss. It turned out to be AWESOME. We played with his new dinosaurs, he told me all bout the cake my sister Mili made him and we stayed up late watching dinosaur videos. We even blew candles together (I had some awesome almond cake leftovers from the weekend) and “ate” cake. I ate it while he pretended to have a piece. I could not be there to kiss and hug him (as if he were going to let me do so, anyway). but at least we shared some time. Just for an afternoon I was back home and I felt extremely happy. I also had the weirdest thought. I have been kind of lonely lately, basically because it is really hard to socialize when I am so worried about passing the boards and doing well at work. I don’t have the time or the energy needed to invest in a good friendship and although there are some people I like and would like to hang out with more often, I just cannot do it. Because of this I have had some rough times lately. Today, while “being at home” I realized for the millionth time how lucky I am to have my family. I know that for my parents we are the coolest and best kids on Earth and I truly believe that no one is better then my sisters. I think they are the coolest people to hang out with and given the option I would never choose anything or anyone over them. I love them a ridiculous amount. And I realize that although in the States I have a very decent living there is a huge emptiness in me that unless I am close to my family I cannot fill. I tried really hard. I was almost able to form my own family here but just could not go through with it. I could not go through with a situation that would bind me to this country forever. I am in a crossroad right now. On one hand being here is safer than in Argentina and I am making way more money than I would make there. On the other hand other than Erik I have no one close to me in Birmingham (yes, LOTS of friends across the country but no one at driving distance) and sometimes I miss my family so much it is unbearable. I don’t have to decide right away but next time I move I would like it to be to a city that fulfills me in more than the professional way. I’ll keep you posted but for now I am rooting for Argentina all the way.

Just when I thought I was over it, I have the most fun and amazing weekend and realize I still want to have a shit load of money to have this life permanently. Oh yes, and I need to move. A.S.A.P.

Just a glance of some of the places we were at:

We were here:

 And here:

And here, among other places:

It was Erik’s birthday yesterday and I wanted to cook him something he really liked —-> PASTA. This month is a little bit tough in my pocket so I decided to use the things we have at home. I have been growing (total over statement) a basil plant for about a year. The poor thing barely survived the winter, mainly because our habit of keeping the house at 60F. At some point during the summer it seemed to have revived but because of a mixture of super hot days and me forgetting to water it, it ended up becoming a 2 feet tall stick with some sad leaves popping out every so often. So for Erik’s day I thought I could sacrifice the plant and end its agony. I looked up Mario Batali’s pesto recipe that calls for two cups of basil leaves. I looked at my plant, looked at the measuring cup and decided I had WAY more basil than what the recipe called for. Note to self: I can’t eyeball shit. The pesto turned out to taste more like pine nuts butter with a hint of olive oil. Lucky for Erik, he got some instant flu like symptoms (weird, I had no idea flu could have a sudden onset …gotta remember that for my boards) and could not eat anymore (you know… flu makes you loose appetite and stuff). As for me, I was stuck with two bowls of pasta tossed in a brownish paste. I never wished for a dog as much as I did yesterday night. I could not just admit to Erik I had been wrong about the basil all along so I downed as much as I could and then told him he better get in bed, cause u know… he might get even worse otherwise. Once he was gone I HAD to redeem myself, so I had the great idea to make him lava cakes, because what’s a birthday without a cake? Now these came out really good…but only because he woke up from all the noise I was making, decided I was messing this too and took over the kitchen. Which, I must say, I am glad he did. These things are awesome.

He followed this recipe, and they ended up looking like this:

We have harvested so many cucumbers we cannot eat them fast enough. They are the short and tough skin ones, really good for pickling. Because of this, today we are pickling some.

We used Alton Brown’s Kinda sorta sours pickle recipe with half the sugar it calls for. We also added dill and some of our Thai peppers which, by the way, are hot as hell.

It is bean time! Our plants are going WILD! The tomatoes have some sort of fungus but they are still growing, all the crazy spicy peppers Erik planted have tons of fruits, the bell pepper has the cutest purple pepper ever, the carrots are taking over the plot and the faithful cucumbers were so heavy they broke the strings they were holding on to. Our beans started our timidly, with tons of flowers but only one bean here and there. It seems it was only a matter of time, since today we harvested almost 2 pounds!

Our super easy recipe:

Cut the tips of the beans and remove the side strings if they have them

Wash them

Place them in a frying pan

Add around 100ml of water, cover and let them steam for 5 minutes in high heat

Remove water, if there is any left, and place back over heat

Add a pat or two of unsalted butter and toss the beans so they get a nice buttery coat

you can add some chopped garlic and crispy bacon if you want to

remove from heat and add salt and pepper to taste.

It is hard to believe that around 2 months ago we were looking through this same window at  one of the deadliest tornadoes in the history of Birmingham…